After Years of Sex in the Dark, Wife Finds Out Husband was Using Dildo Whole Time

“YEA I USED A DILDO IT WAS A STRAP ON I WORE IT UNDER MY JEANS, BUT TELL HER TO EXPLAIN HOW SHE GOT PREGNANT? CUZ THAT KID DAMN SURE AIN’T MINE”

Said a frustrated Andre Sanders after leaving his now pregnant wife.

Sarah Sanders is divorcing her husband of 7 years of marriage after finding out he was using a dildo during love making the entire time. Mr. Sanders feels his wife was too overweight and after seeing that her hole was too open, he knew she wouldn’t be able feel anything.

“I KNEW SOMETHING JUST WASN’T RIGHT I MEAN WHENEVER HE CLIMAXED IT WOULD STAY THE SAME, AS FAR AS MY PREGNANCY I THINK I HAD A RIGHT TO STEP OUT ON OUR MARRIAGE BECAUSE OBVIOUSLY THAT PLASTIC WAS NOT SATISFYING ME I NEEDED THE REAL THING” — SARAH

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